Surreality is not a word but it FITS

It is 7am and I'm sitting in my lovely Crown Plaza hotel room in downtown Phillidelphia posting my last blog from the United States.  By the end of this day I will be well on my way to Brussels.

ANNNNNNNND I CAN'T FLIPPPPPPIN BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!

I am simply amazed that I am here at this point!  I can't believe I'm getting on a plane and moving to another country.  

All day yesterday during training, every about 15 minutes I would have a little conniption realizing I AM ACTUALLY HERE!  After waiting for so long, I am actually at training, going over expectation, sitting with strangers that I will share the next 2 years with, receiving my first monetary allotment, I AM HERE!!! 

Thoughts going through my head:

Did I get everything done?

Will I be next to someone annoying on the plane?

WHAT IS THIS GONNA BE LIKE?!!

What will I be working on specifically?!

INTERNET?!!

AHHHHHHHH!!!???

There are SOOOO many things running through my mind!!

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But most of all, I just can't believe that I'm actually here.  That I actually made it.  That after all this work, all this time, I made it.  I'm getting on the plane and I'm doing this.  

Believe, with all that you are, that persistence and faith does prevail.  Don't stop, don't quit, keep moving forward.  You have no choice if your goal is significance.  If your goal is to live on purpose rather than just living, then you must keep moving foward. 

Why?

Because We Oughta :-)

Really? Horseback Riding on the Black Sea?

 Knowing that I was leaving for the Peace Corps soon, I knew I had a limited time to take FULL advantage of my flight benefits!!!  I had been planning since I became a flight attendant to go to Istanbul to visit my DEAR friend, Katy, who has been there teaching for the past several years.

It didn't look like I was going to get the week off I needed to go, buuuuuuut in regular miraculous fashion, IT HAPPENED!!

I was able to spend a FABULOUS week in Istanbul!  I can't even explain how absolutely amazing it was to make it to Istanbul.  I couldn't believe that after trying to get off work and make it to her for sooooo long I FINALLY was sitting next to a Persian and a Turkish man having a tri-lingual conversation (one of many on the trip I might add) on Turkish airlines on my way to Istanbul.

We had sooooo many amazing experiences, ate the best food, met amazing people.  This....was on the top 5 of my life's journey's :-).

On my 3rd day in Istanbul, we took a long bus ride up the mountains just above Istanbul to the Black Sea.  We reached the black see right at sunset.  It was absolutely stunning.

And there were horses!!  As we waited for the horses and their owner to come back up the beach so we could ride, I became emotional staring at this beauty.  I couldn't believe that a year and a half after leaving Atlanta with nothing, I was standing at the Black Sea in Istanbul, going horse back riding at sunset.  Not only that but I was soon to embark on the adventure of a lifetime and pursue my dreams in Peace Corps.  Not only that but I was debt free and had the money to blow on a fabulous vacation like this!  I was amazed that as amazing as this was, it wasn't even the pinnacle of what is to come.  More life still awaits.

Nothing, absolutely nothing, is impossible.  What you believe and what you speak is what will happen.  Never believe that your situation is hopeless.  If you are breathing, change is possible.

Decide what it is you want, and run after it with unabandon.....

Why?

Because its worth every second of it  :-)


                                                                             

In the beginning.....

I have had the following conversation repeatedly over the past several months:


"I'm moving!!" 
"Oh really?! Where?" 
"Guinea, West Africa!!!"
*confused, bewildered look*
"But, Why?"

The answer to this question is not simple.  But I feel like what best describes why I'm here at this point in my life is to share just a little bit of the past 2 and a half years.

At the beginning of 2009, I was laid off.  I was managing a high-end consignment boutique, and the store shut down.  And the job market in Atlanta was terrible at the time.  Most of my friends were being laid off or getting less hours and less pay at their positions.  I started working as a security receptionist at Delta administrative offices making $8.50/hr; barely enough to pay my bills.  I moved from my home in Smyrna to live with my aunt in Lawrenceville.  I was driving 2 hours to work and back every day.  I was working only to pay for gas.  I emptied all of my savings.  My car went into repossession.  I quit my job and started a real estate investment company, that also later failed.  At the same time, I was a part of a ministry for going on 6 years that at the time called me to drive to opposite ends of the city once a week to visit the homes of about 25 people to help them develop in their relationships with God.  I was depleted, scattered, and had been for a long time.  It took a conversation with a person very close to me, my then fiance, for me to see something needed to change.  At the end of 2009, I took 2 weeks at home in Knoxville away from everything and everyone to pray and find what was next.  I came out of that time with complete peace that it was time to leave my beloved Atlanta.

In my solitude over those 2 weeks, I knew it was time to go after my dreams.  I applied to every international organization involved in economic development.  With nothing but my car full of my things, I moved back home to Knoxville, nervous about what was to come and distraught over leaving my life behind.


My Peace Corps application was pushed back a total of 3 times. First medical clearance, then for legal clearance, then the fights between Obama and the republicans put a hold on Peace Corps leave dates for another year.  In waiting for that coveted invitation letter, I needed income.  Several positions came into being--call center operator, IHOP waitress, Census worker--all of which made me want to curse on a regular basis.  One day laying on my aunt's couch a conversation with God (yes, God) ensued:


Me:  This blows!  I want to do something that I LOVE!!!
God:  Well, if you could anything right now.....what would you do?
Me:  If I could do ANYTHING?!!
God:  Yep, anything.
Me:  I would want to work for an airline so I could travel!!!
God: Ok.


 The  NEXT day, I found a flight attendant position on Craigslist (random, I know) and by the end of the next week I was on my way to Ohio for training with PSA Airlines (a subsidiary of US Airways).  Within a week my conversation had become a reality!  A-MA-ZING!!


Over the past year, I've had my fair share of struggles, however in the midst there have also been beautiful blessings.  I lost alot of friends when I left Atlanta, I ended a long term relationship, and I struggled with many growing pains.  But also as I paid off my debts, I got to travel the United States, and the world.  I spent really good time with my family.  I have made some of the best friends.  My relationships have grown richer.  I have dreamed bigger and lived fuller.  I've learned so much about myself, and I know there's only more to go.  


With this blog, I will show you my heart, my life, my adventures, and my lessons.  I hope you grow from it as I do myself!


One thing I've learned through these tumultuous times is that everything - good, bad, negative, positive, life changing - each and everything is a blessing and I am GRATEFUL to have been where I've been and seen what I've seen.    Don't despise the journey on your way to the destination.  Because the journey TRULY is the best part of the end result :-)